Here is the X-Men Apocalypse trailer.
This looks awful.
And don’t worry, I have my reasons.
1. No stars.
Where are the big time actors?
Where are the people that I want to see in a movie?
I don’t see any of them?
Which leads right into my second point.
2. Where is Wolverine?
Someone should tell them that they forget the most popular X-Men.
Because I didn’t see Wolverine in the trailer.
3. I get it, you’re X-Men!
Why do they keep saying that they are X-Men in the trailer?
I’m not stupid. (not all the time)
Why do they keep saying who they are?
It is so awkward and unrealistic.
I would never say that I am Theodore Ficklestein on this blog.
Well, besides right there.
Because no one talks in third person about themselves and is taken seriously.
4. It looks like the other trailers I just saw.
When I saw Deadpool and this trailer played in the previews, I remember telling the person I was with, that I would rather see Deadpool twice then see this movie once.
I saw this movie already!
Big bad guy wants to kill everyone.
Only a few people can do it.
They somehow overcome their differences and come together to take down the big bad guy.
I know how this ends.
5. What is up with the religious aspect?
This is not Superman!
There is nothing religious about the X-Men.
There never was.
Superman has something with the whole Jesus Christ angle, but the X-Men?
God, the Four Horsemen Of The Apocalypse.
Since when did the X-Men have meaning to it?
They shouldn’t try to be religious, because they are going to look stupid doing it.
6. Oh my god! He’s bald!
Why is it a big deal when a character reveals himself to be bald?
Superman Vs Batman did the same thing with Lex Luthor.
I know Professor Xavier was going bald eventually.
So what is the big deal when he becomes it?
Movies have to stop acting like an already know transformation is so important.
7. Olivia Munn sucks. (just ask Aaron Rodgers)
Why is she in the movie.
She can’t act.
She is only a pretty face.
I am going to cringe at the scenes she is in.
I GET IT!
This movie is the apocalypse because they are trying to get by without Wolverine.
That is why things go bad.
He is not in the movie!
If he was in the movie, do you really think they would be afraid of a god?
MY BET WITH YOU:
I bet that Quicksilver will die in this movie.
If he does, then I don’t have to see this movie, (because right now, I don’t want to)
If he doesn’t and he lives, then I will see this movie and write a review about it!
How will I know that he dies, if I don’t want to see it?
One of you can spoiler it for me, or I will just read about it.
This is like a layup with how the trailer presented him.